Housing affordability is getting tougher, and the cost of living keeps rising. More and more, I am seeing Australian parents step in to support their adult children. Whether it is with a house deposit, helping with the mortgage, or covering day-to-day expenses, the Bank of Mum and Dad has become one of the country’s biggest lenders.

This kind of generosity comes from a good place, but without the right structure, it can lead to confusion and conflict.

That is something I recently spoke about with IFA (Independent Financial Adviser). As a financial adviser, I often work with families who are trying to navigate these situations. It is not about telling people they should not help their kids. It is about helping them understand the longer-term consequences and create a plan that makes sense for everyone involved.

When good intentions need a clear plan

One of the biggest risks I see is when parents use their retirement savings or give large financial gifts without any discussion or clear agreement. It might feel right at the time, but things can get messy if circumstances change later.

Often, parents assume the money will come back eventually or be accounted for in the will. But those assumptions are not always shared or talked about, and that is where trouble begins.

If people are not having conversations about money, everything becomes harder. Assumptions are made, and those assumptions rarely match.

How advisers can help

There are a few ways I support families in this space:

• Clarity on affordability: I help parents understand what financial support means for their own goals, especially their retirement.
• Facilitating conversations: I create a neutral space where families can talk about expectations, boundaries, and repayment.
• Encouraging formal agreements: I often work with lawyers to make sure support is structured, documented, and fair.

One of the best pieces of advice I give is this: make the agreement while everyone still likes each other. It is about protecting relationships as much as protecting finances.

Family first, but future-focused

Helping your children financially can be a powerful way to support their future. But it should not come at the expense of your own.

With the right advice, it is possible to give generously, plan wisely, and protect both your wealth and your relationships. 🔗 You can read the original article on IFA.