Being named as the executor of someone’s will can feel like an honour – a sign that they trusted you to carry out their wishes and deal with their affairs after they’re gone.

But it’s also potentially a large, overwhelming job.

Executors can find themselves dealing with banks, lawyers, accountants, beneficiaries, debts, tax returns and mountains of paperwork – often while they’re grieving themselves.

I spoke with estate planning lawyer David Patkin from DMP Legal on my podcast Life, Loss & Legacy about what being an executor actually involves. David has more than 15 years’ experience advising on wealth succession and estate administration, so I took the opportunity to ask him about the rights, responsibilities and risks that come with the role.

Here are some of the most important things we covered.

First things first: you might not actually need probate

One important point David made is that being named as an executor doesn’t automatically mean you need to apply for a Grant of Probate.

It depends on what the deceased owned and, importantly, how those assets were held.

As David explained:

“For example, if you’ve got a couple, and they own all their assets jointly, they might not even need a grant of probate.”

This matters because applying for probate takes time, costs money and creates another administrative burden at a time when most people could very much do without one.

It’s just one reason good estate planning before someone dies can make such a difference following a bereavement.

Decide whether you’re the right person for the job before you start

Being named as an executor doesn’t mean you have to accept the role. If you don’t want to do it – or you’re simply not in a position to take it on – you may be able to renounce the role, allowing another executor or appropriate person to take on the administration instead.

The important thing is to make that decision before you start administering the estate.

David introduced me to the concept of “intermeddling”.

Essentially, if you start taking steps as the executor – dealing with asset holders, starting the administration process or otherwise holding yourself out as the deceased’s representative – it may no longer be straightforward to change your mind and walk away.

As David put it: “The best thing that an executor can do if they don’t want to be executor is to do nothing from the outset and say, ‘I don’t want to do it.’”

So before jumping into bank accounts, assets and paperwork because something needs to be done, establish who is actually taking on the executor role – and whether they’re willing to see it through.

Your job is to follow the will – not improve it

An executor effectively stands in the shoes of the deceased. That means administering the estate according to their wishes, not making the decisions you think they should have made.

I asked David what happens if an executor disagrees with the will.

His answer?

“Unfortunately, as much as you may hate it as an executor, and you might think this is a ridiculous provision, you’ve got to follow that will to the letter. Even if you think it’s not just: for example, if it gives 100% to a charity and the deceased has left some poor child who’s really struggling. The law will support that child in terms of a claim on the estate, but unfortunately, the executor has to follow the will. That’s their blueprint.”

There may be avenues for beneficiaries to challenge it, but that’s a separate issue.

In some ways, that lack of discretion can be useful. When family members are unhappy, the executor can point back to the will: these aren’t your decisions.

As I said during our chat:

“It speaks to the power of the will as a document…. It’s a very methodical and very detailed approach, and it can seem a little bit silly because it’s a couple of pages of paper, but that will drive everything once you’re gone.”

Communicate early and set expectations

While the paperwork is certainly time consuming, one of the harder parts of being an executor can be managing the expectations of the people waiting to receive an inheritance.

David has seen beneficiaries start making plans for money almost as soon as someone dies – even attending auctions or signing contracts based on an inheritance that hasn’t arrived yet. But administering an estate takes time, and there can be very good reasons why an executor can’t simply hand over the money.

In Victoria, for example, there can be risks in distributing an estate within the first six months. As David explains in the episode, an executor can potentially become personally liable if a successful claim is later made and distributed assets can’t be recovered.

That’s why David recommends communicating with beneficiaries from the outset:

“Let them know that there is a process that you have to follow… and to be mindful that they’re not really going to see anything for at least six months, even up to a year.”

Setting those expectations early won’t necessarily prevent every family disagreement – estates do have a knack for bringing those to the surface – but it can help beneficiaries understand what’s happening, why it takes time and what they can realistically expect.

Good record-keeping is essential

At its heart, David describes estate administration as “an accounting exercise”.

Executors need to identify assets and liabilities, establish values, pay debts and expenses, keep track of transactions and eventually distribute what remains.

His two big rules? “Keep records of everything and do things in a timely manner.”

That doesn’t mean rushing. Quite the opposite – work methodically, keep notes and records, and get professional advice where you need it.

As I said towards the end of our conversation, “You are going to have to make some decisions at some stage and you have the guidance and the capacity around you to do so.”

Being an executor is rarely something people do often enough to become good at it. You may only do it once or twice in your life – and you’ll probably be doing it during a difficult time.

So don’t martyr yourself. Ask questions; get good advice; keep good records; and don’t rush the process.

You’re ultimately responsible for administering the estate, but that doesn’t mean you need to become an expert in estate law, tax and accounting overnight, so bring in good professional advice where you need it.

If you’d like to hear the full conversation between David and I – including probate, debts, tax, estate claims, beneficiary disputes and some of the mistakes executors can make – listen to the full episode on Life, Loss & Legacy.

Listen to the episode: The Rights, Responsibilities and Risks of Being an Executor.

P.S. Want to know more? Read my articles “When Tax Meets Grief: What Executor Need to Know” and “Understanding Probate: The First Legal Hurdle After Loss”.